i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize
