Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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