We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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