dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
this is an emotional support booty call
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
