he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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