quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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