my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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