If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
