how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize