Heybabeimwearingurpanties
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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