I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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