Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
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