Got a toothbrush?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize