his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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