There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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