You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
