the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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