I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
