i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
birth control should be required to get into college
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
