I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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