she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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