Old men and throwing up are my life now.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
