what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
