I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
