Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
