Joe is yelling at the trees again.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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