i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
