In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
