just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
how drunk are you?
Several
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
