How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
