so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
