they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
