Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
