she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
