yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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