My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
