Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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