bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize