Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
