k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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