have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
