ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
PANTIES FOUND
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