Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
