I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
