...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
