If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
