so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
