Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
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