4 words: hood of his car
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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