Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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