So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
